Brain Food for Pioneering Spirits: What helpful reflection methods are out there? Dr. Yasemin Yazan, Layla and Jürgen swap real techniques — from success journals and gratitude jars, to sending yourself voice messages that suddenly sound like your mother, to why Jürgen calls meditation the single most demanding reflection method of all…
Note: This session was recorded live in German as part of the Deep Talk Club, so the video above is German-language audio only. What follows is an English translation of the conversation, lightly edited for readability — the back-and-forth between the moderator and participants is preserved, but the original timestamps and speaker names have been left out.
A very good morning to you. Today we’re finally continuing with the methods of reflection, a room whose content aspects have kept coming up already, and we’ve kept putting it off, and today it’s finally time for us to actually look at the methods. The question we want to engage with today is really, what helpful reflection methods are there? What do we know? What have we maybe already tried? Whether within a training, self-applied at home, however here — let’s just gather various things together, and maybe also gladly bring in a few experiences too, if you want. And the goal is, so to speak, to also be able to check for yourself, to a degree, which of these I know, or which are new to me, and maybe this or that sounds interesting too, so you say, yes, let me try that out for myself too. I didn’t know that yet, and maybe this is a nice opportunity to actually enter into reflection with it too. Yes, and with that you’re all really, really warmly welcome to join in this morning too, to steer the reflection room together with me in one direction, and then see what comes out of it, what all gets gathered together. And in that sense I’ll gladly mute myself now and see who’d like to join first this morning. Oh yes, and gladly a reminder too that we record the room, and anyone who joins automatically agrees to that, agrees that the whole thing gets published too. Then we have three small room rules: a profile picture where you’re recognizable, first and last name, and at least one sentence in your bio. And anyone who doesn’t want that for whatever reason can of course also use the chat, to bring in a question or share thoughts about this or that, maybe about some method, for example. With the methods it would be nice if, over chat, you at least don’t just write down the name of the method or something, because it’s often the case that one and the same method might be labeled differently by name, so you don’t necessarily know exactly what’s behind it. So that would at least be a bit unfavorable for today, if that should come up in the chat. So gladly join in for that instead. Right. And methods of reflection, what helpful reflection methods are there? That’s the question we want to engage with today. And accordingly I’ll just look now to see who’d like to join. A very good morning, dear Layla.
A very good morning. I’m trying to figure out how the new Clubhouse works. But I’m quite glad it works here the way it used to. So, I’m wondering right now whether that was already a reflection. What I’ve found is, writing is good. For everyone who doesn’t like to write, I don’t know, a voice message maybe, but writing really is a good method, and it’s not necessarily about writing down negative experiences, but you can, I think, consciously steer it by keeping a success diary. I find that a good method. Yes, and maybe also that you come up with a system for yourself. So drawing that out might not be so bad either, so you recognize a systematics. That you say, okay, and how is that? Kind of in the direction of a brainstorm. Okay, where do I stand? What’s the constellation? I think it depends. I think the method has something to do with what you use it for. What do I want to solve, or what do I want to reflect on? I’d orient the method around that. I think that’s really, really important. What do you say to that?
There we already have two aspects. One is to look at the methods themselves, and then maybe also pick up on, well, what do I actually orient myself by when I apply methods, and how I apply them, and how I maybe find the fitting or right method for myself in a certain context too. And you just mentioned the success diary, so the types of representation, we talked about that yesterday, things like writing or mind mapping and so on. Today it’s really about naming the methods quite concretely too, and maybe also describing what happens there. Now you named the success diary. So, diary of any kind, basically. Success diary, that already suggests, to a degree, leaning on the term success attached to the front of it, that it’s about recording the successes of the day, probably. But maybe you’d like to, before we also pick up and look at the second aspect again, first describe a bit how such a success diary can be designed, for example. There’s no right or wrong here, but rather, that’s what I meant earlier. There are different constellations of what’s behind it. Many might have already heard of a success diary, but how it’s designed can certainly be handled differently too. And Layla, maybe you’d like to just say how you use it for yourself, or how you’ve applied it so far.
Gladly. So that was a tip I got from a good friend. He said to me, when he noticed that I focused on certain experiences and not others, that I should do a perspective shift. And he said this perspective shift could work through a success diary. He said, take a book you like to hold, take something you find nice, because you should want to use it daily, and write down five things that were good, that you think were good. Now, on the topic of success — what defines success? For one person, success is, I passed my term paper back in university, I gave a good pitch. But it can also be other things, and I think it’s important to say that, because many people think, well, but success, what success did I have during the day? Well, it’s important to shift the perspective, and that’s why, back then, I also wrote down things like, yes, that I kissed my partner, because that was nice, or that I smiled at someone and that person smiled back, because those are also things that are good. And that’s what it’s about, I think, adopting this perspective shift. I think it’s also important, timewise I can’t quite place it, I don’t remember exactly, that you also keep reading through it again and again. And funnily enough I found it again recently, and then I looked at it again, and thought, oh, that really was a nice time. Because I think it has to do with perspective and lens, and consciously adopting a perspective shift.
Yes, wonderful, thank you so much. And then there are also diaries with different names, so quite classically there’s also, for example, the gratitude diary, where it’s then, in turn, about recording aspects of the day, not the successes, but to express gratitude. That could be, for example, three points. The number you want to record here can also be varied yourself, whether that’s three, five, or ten. Depending — maybe it’s harder at the beginning, and over time, once you’re a bit practiced, it gets easier too, to find things, to also find the small things, both in the context of success, what I define as success for myself for the day, and also what I’m grateful for. And then there’s certainly also — and now I’m mentioning the gratitude diary again for this reason — certainly the combination too, so that within one diary, for example, you have three points for gratitude, and then, say, three to five points for the day’s successes, maybe even pick up aspects you’re aiming for the next day, defining a few points with regard to goals or similar too. That means, you can definitely go into a combination here too, so that you pick out aspects from life that seem important to you, to shift your focus. You put it so nicely, it’s basically about directing focus onto something too. And what does the whole thing have to do with? Neuroscientifically, that has to do with the fact that, especially in everyday life, we tend a lot, through our brain’s programming, since it’s primarily about securing existence, to actually only be able to perceive things more clearly and increasingly that went badly, so the things we evaluate as negative. That means, something that upset us during the day, something occupying us in some way, something that’s maybe also emotionally negatively connoted, so in our own evaluation. That’s much more in the foreground for us, because our brain is about checking, again and again, whether something threatens my existence. And that’s why especially the aspects that went well during the day, though we perceive them too, they much more quickly recede into the background, so to speak, get forgotten, so that it’s a nice tool, the diary, to really specifically pick out these aspects here and quite consciously direct the focus onto them, to make sure we can also get into self-efficacy here too. Through us making ourselves aware again and again that, spread throughout the day, a lot of “good things” happen too, everything we then evaluate as good in that context. Layla, would you like to build on this too?
Yes, because something else just occurred to me, namely someone I knew. That person was at a seminar once, and was told, I think, that she should carry lentils, or dried peas, around with her during the day. I’d also like to encourage other objects, so you don’t want to carry so much around with you, but maybe carry something during the day. And then it was said, well, whenever something good happens to you, or something you want happens, put this lentil in the other pocket. And at first she found that a bit strange. And two weeks later she came to me and said, oh, that really worked. Because I noticed it so consciously, also through this activity I then did. I found that quite nice. I’d take other objects, I don’t want dried lentils in my pocket, but or other beans. Maybe I’d take glitter stones. But I find it quite nice.
Yes, thank you so much. I think we had this method recently, in a slightly modified form, at the author breakfast with Miriam Hof last Sunday too. It was about, I think, she mentioned buttons or something, also carrying those in your pants pocket, so to speak, and then, whenever something positive happened, into the other pants pocket, and then counting at the end of the day and looking and recalling what positive things happened, to then enter into this reflection. I find that a nice example, here again you see, what you do it with, you can definitely vary that. That means, there are no specific objects, but it should just be something you can easily carry with you at that point. Jürgen, a very good…
Quickly, before you welcome Jürgen, because I’d have a small follow-up question. Does that have something to do with head, hand, and heart, because what I then thought was, this writing too, that’s something conscious. That’s this activity. From a neuroscience perspective, do I become more conscious of something through the fact that I’m carrying out an activity, a physical action with it? That would interest me now too. And Jürgen, I wish you a very good morning. Sorry that I interrupted again.
Well, basically, the more senses I incorporate, so to speak, the more sustainable, or the more effective, it is ultimately in processing and perception too. Because we have the five senses. We talked, I think, yesterday too, when we briefly talked about the senses, with the types of representation for reflection. That’s ultimately these senses, through which we take in the various stimuli. And basically, in the representation, ultimately everything we pick up or use, so to speak, is docked onto this transmission of the senses, so via sensory perception. And just as, when we talk about learning methods or something, it can well be that one person or another maybe — there’s also this differentiation by types, where you say, I’m more visual, or auditory, or whatever. But there’s no pure type. So it could be that I might prefer this or that. Nonetheless, there are always different contexts. And even if I’m, say, the visual type, I certainly won’t be able to do anything visual while driving, for example, necessarily. So I’m talking about learning now — if I, could I now watch a YouTube video or something while driving, then I might rather listen to an audiobook instead. And it’s similar, basically, with the various methods I can apply for reflection too. It can well be that there are certain things I prefer. And at the same time that doesn’t mean I should exclude other things, but quite the opposite. And we had a really concrete example from coaching yesterday too, where I said, for example, if I accompany coaching sessions, if I have someone with me who tends, quite evidently, to be very, for example, cognitively oriented, and always records things in writing, quite specifically and consciously transitioning and switching and saying, now it’s time to do something visual in this context, to pay into exactly that, to get, for example, to this emotional level. That means, this quite conscious switch, despite what I might normally prefer, can certainly unfold effective new insights in this context, especially when it comes to reflection too. Jürgen, a very good morning. What are your thoughts on the topic?
Good morning, dear Yasemin, good morning Layla, everyone else in the room. I’m picking up two statements from you, namely, in your second-to-last remark you pointed out that doing isn’t only about focusing on negative aspects, but also on positive ones. And in your last contribution you said “things I prefer.” “Things” I understood as “methods I prefer.” Let me take a step back from the position of which method I choose, by saying, the method also depends on the method competence of the person applying the method. So, to put it bluntly, I don’t have every degree of freedom in selecting a method, whether it’s reflection, or thinking, or in some other form, if I don’t have the necessary competence for it. That’s one point I’d like to give for consideration, and just as an example from my own personal field — I think keeping a diary, which I also did for a while, requires a different method competence, and requires a different structuring in implementing the methodology, than, say, mind mapping. And the second aspect I’d like to bring in is, you mentioned this right at the beginning, that we might also address, again, the preconditions for choosing the methodology. And there, for me, a really essential point, dear Yasemin, is, who does the reflection with a certain method actually hit? I mean by that, myself — if I have the need to reflect, what state am I in? Especially in weighing whether the initial trigger that leads me to a reflection and then to selecting a method — is this initial trigger more emotional, or is it rationally grounded? Is it an initial trigger that comes, in quotation marks, from within me, from a feeling, that something’s not right with me? Or is it a quite concrete one, from the professional context, we had various examples, an initial trigger that forces me, relatively quickly, under certain circumstances, to arrive at a result by means of a method. That’s what I wanted to give as input for today, and thanks for listening.
Yes, wonderful, thank you so much. And especially with the last point you addressed, the question would now follow, what difference would that make with regard to method selection, from your view, Jürgen?
If I may answer that from my own field — you know I’m an absolute fan of mind mapping, have been for eons of years, both professionally and privately, because I think, and I attribute this to myself, I’m a really structured and order-loving person. And I especially, and Layla addressed this, I also see a really essential aspect of reflection in the corresponding, comprehensible
retraceability. After a certain time, Layla pointed out, it’s nice when you can read it again, and so on. With mind mapping, it’s not just the documentation of emotions I had, of ideas, of perspectives I newly opened up, that’s in the foreground, but the mind map also documents my thinking through the sequence of how it was created, clockwise, how I thought, and how I possibly drew conclusions, or also deleted contributions. And that’s the reason why I say that requires a completely different method competence, and on the other hand also a different situation and a different personal feeling, where I say, no, that takes too long for me now. I’ll take my iPhone and use the iPhone now and speak my mind freely, because right now I don’t have the nerve to think about structures, I just want to get it off my chest. That’s what I meant, also in connection with the position of, how am I currently positioned as the person reflecting. You could also say, how important, how urgent is it for me, and I now grab whatever definitely ensures I can secure it for myself. I hope I’ve answered your question with that.
Yes, wonderful, thank you so much. And while you mentioned the WhatsApp message, another method occurred to me in this context, by the way. So I could of course just record that, for example. I could do that as a WhatsApp message, and I don’t think, I don’t know if you said WhatsApp, I think you just said speak. I can use various tools here, so to speak. And specifically, that’s where the thought with the WhatsApp message occurred to me, that’s why I’d like to pick that up right away, so I don’t forget it — that’s also a method I can apply, for example, similar to the success diary, so not in written form, but in verbal form, for example addressing three to five successes of the day to myself. So that I basically — for example, you could create a group with yourself and maybe some number you don’t use, or a second phone you have, or whatever, to then, in the group, share a WhatsApp message to yourself, so to speak. And this message then contains, or covers, so to speak, the three to five points of what I did particularly well today. And specifically as if I’m talking to myself as my counterpart. So, not, I did this and that well today, but, Yasemin, that was really great, how you achieved this or that today. Just as an example. And the nice thing about this method is, when some time has passed and you listen to these messages, that you have the feeling you didn’t say that yourself, but that someone else is saying it to you. Because we all have this phenomenon, that usually we have someone in the family whose voice is really similar. That means it could well be that this awakens the feeling that it’s the mother saying that to you, or that it’s the father, or the brother or the sister, whatever. And that’s really exciting, because that then also unfolds a completely different effect, actually, when you also have, on top of that, the feeling that it’s coming from outside, well knowing that you know it’s not actually the case. Maybe nice to share here too. I wouldn’t have thought of this method at all, if you hadn’t brought in this recording-yourself-speaking aspect, Jürgen. Thank you so much for that. Layla, would you like to build on this too?
Yes, gladly. So I have something else in mind, but let me try to address your point again and the thoughts that came to me while doing so. And what I thought about is — I find this audio recording thing quite exciting. I’ve done that more often for idea collection. And also notes like that. Because it’s nice that you always have your phone with you. And I found that I lacked an organization system. Because I needed this haptic thing. I needed to know, okay, here’s the place for that. So I’m the type — for everyone who says this is incredibly easy — I need such fixed systems, and because of that, for example, my WhatsApp history, there’s something there, and something there. That’s why I’d probably need a dedicated app where I can do that, and in this app then, so to speak, sort it into subcategories — this is for this, this is for this, this is for this — and I’d first need to set up a system for that, and that’s put me off so far, because sometimes I’m more searching than finding, and then reflecting. What else occurred to me — I saw a video by Vera Birkenbihl, and what I found really nice there, sometimes you’re so sure about what you think. And I found that so nice, because she demonstrated it, I’m this and that type, I do this and that. I’m a pessimist. I’m an optimist. She gave people sentence starters. The world is a … place. The world, people are … And I found that so interesting. I can’t remember the sentences now, but they were really conscious and targeted, to find out, am I a pessimist? Am I an optimist? How do I think about situations? And what I noticed was, she then reflected on that with the people afterward too, and said, okay, what could that mean now, that they entered this or that. And I think it’s important that you do that too, to then dissect it again. But it became clear to me, yes, maybe it’s different than I thought. And maybe I also think differently about the situation because of that. And I also find it important that in reflection, you don’t just do it, but that with this reflection method, you consciously look at it again, to then achieve this result. Because I know this from my profession, that you have something really, really nice, but it doesn’t get used extensively, but it’s just an opener in class. So, this is this and that. And then you move on. But you could get so, so much out of that, in the sense that you could reflect so much on it. That works just with a picture alone. But I mean, the sentence starters, those were really nice. Thanks for listening.
Wonderful. Thank you so much. And what I’d also like to pick up on, we already talked briefly about this yesterday too, are the questioning techniques, because especially the conversation, or the techniques we apply with questions, in the context of questions, often gets “forgotten” with methods, because it’s so simple, so to speak — Jürgen, you’re on loud right now, just as a note, thank you — that you maybe don’t think about it that much, or you always have the feeling you need a huge toolbox, in quotation marks, to really have meaningful methods, but that the simple things, like questioning techniques, for example, are certainly really, really effective too, if applied nicely. And especially with questioning techniques, there are incredibly many variants you can choose here. And you can maybe also differentiate a bit, what can I apply well when I’m alone, so with myself, so to speak, and on the other hand especially when, for example, you’re with two people, or apply it in a group. One of the questioning techniques you can apply are basically scaling questions. You can apply those really well alone too, for example. Something like, on a scale of 1 to 10, how satisfied am I with XYZ, or how am I feeling emotionally right now? Where 1 is, say, the lowest value, 10 is the highest value, and accordingly the degree. And then you can, and the scaling questions are especially well-suited for this, if I ask myself this question at the beginning, for example, then do something with what’s currently occupying me, for example. So let’s say I was emotional just now and go into reflection. And after the reflection, apply the scaling question again, to make the scale evaluation again, to then see if a change has taken place. And if so, then we’ve succeeded, for example, in going into an emotion regulation at that point. So, that’s also quite exciting, to also get a sense of whether this reflection has maybe changed something too. Jürgen, did you want to build on this too?
Yes, very gladly. Let me pick up the topic you just pointed out. This question is exactly such a position for me, these two anchors I’d need or should check, to point out. On one hand the competence of how I ask a question, and on the other hand, from what emotional and/or professional field, or from what state, I ask this question, and you can certainly explain that better than I can, and especially, I’ve had to have this experience too, when I especially use writing in reflection, and this is also connected to that, then it’s really essential, I’ve found in hindsight, how I asked this question. And this question effectively reflects the emotionality, or the logic, or both present or also not present. And in that sense, this questioning is a really essential determinant for the success of the reflection. And, so thumbs up for that again.
I can only agree 100 percent, and I think, especially with this point you just addressed, it becomes clear that with reflection, we’re dealing with a challenging activity, that it’s a challenging activity we impose on ourselves. Let’s leave that for the end, but I’d also gladly like to pick this up from another aspect.
Questioning technique. If I now determine I lack the necessary competence in questioning technique, then I’ll leave the questioning be. We’ve had, I don’t remember how long now, since two weeks, the legalization of cannabis. And my question, or my initial trigger, goes in the direction of, meditation and trance — are those also methods of reflection for you?
Thank you. Yes, nice question. Layla, would you maybe like to build on this first?
Yes, I can gladly do that, because I think those are certainly possibilities, because our mind is very often bound. It’s often bound to an activity, or our thoughts too. And I think that, I don’t know who in the room has already meditated, but meditating — well, that was really esoteric, really foreign to me. And I did it anyway, so consciously, and found, under guidance, that it brings my mind to rest, that maybe not in that moment, because I was told not to think while meditating, which is personally really hard for me, because I always think, so I believe, or often think, and that can also be really exhausting, that my mind can come to rest here. And afterward, yes, insights come to me, or things happen, even though I hadn’t invested that work there and consciously thought about something. And then it still happened, and maybe because I’d given myself this quiet. And then afterward I thought, well, eureka, there really was something there. That’s why I’d definitely count that as a method. I find it a really good method. And I wanted to briefly add something about these questioning techniques. I wanted to say what really helps me is asking questions like this when situations happen. So there was the question, is this still important to me in five years? And can I consciously influence this? So, is the situation important to me? Is the person important to me? And not going into any kind of evaluation at all, so that I devalue someone, but simply for myself — is that still important then? And that, for example, hasn’t given me the calm of a Zen monk. But it’s let me see a situation from a different angle. And I found that really nice too. That’s what I wanted to add. Thanks for listening.
Yes, wonderful, thank you so much. Let me pick up on meditation and trance again here, because I find this question really, really exciting. In that context, it probably depends on how we evaluate it. Because meditation, or the trance state, isn’t basically something like the other techniques we apply for reflection, where it’s also about, say, analyzing something, but rather where we put ourselves into a certain state of consciousness, so to speak. Basically it’s partly about letting go and coming to rest too. Interestingly, though, the brain’s energy consumption doesn’t get completely shut off, but even in the resting state our brain keeps working. We might discover various images, and so on, so that when we come out of a trance state, for example, we can certainly then, at the latest, re-enter a reflection again. So in that sense the question is, would you actually already see meditation or trance as a method of reflection, or are those maybe also methods for producing a certain state of consciousness, which then, so to speak, represents the initial trigger for reflection again? I’m curious. Jürgen, what do you say?
Yes, this discussion that’s fortunately opened up now — meditation is now, for me, the placeholder for this challenge I have and need to clarify for myself with regard to this position. Who does this reflection actually hit, if I want to use this method, meditation? I think I already told this story in some room before — I was trained, in my sporting past, to meditatively retrace certain sequences of a competition or a training session, and I’ve continued that afterward again and again too, and I’ve found, exactly from that point, that I’m in a position to do that only in really rare cases, that I’m even capable of it. And I base that, this is my personal experience, on the degree of dominance of logic, or logical thinking, or the release of emotions. That’s the essential point for me, to even be able to define as a precondition, I’m now choosing this method, meditation. From my experience, on your question — this type, or rather the method of how I reflect, maybe arriving via meditation, I can’t confirm that. What the benefit, if you were to ask me, of meditation ultimately was, is that I got fewer perspectives than a really concrete strengths-and-weaknesses message, in the form of physical or supposedly physical exhaustion, and I could pinpoint that at a really specific point. That was, for me, the essential benefit from this meditation. So it’s not so much hoping that I can access some reservoir of the unconscious that’s not yet accessible to me right now, or not accessible with other methods, but it’s a variant, that’s how I felt it, a variant of mirroring yourself and, in a really vivid way, getting the message, for example, now you’re exhausted, or now you’ve also reached your goal. Both positively and negatively. That’s my personal experience with it. But I think, let me say this too, in my view it’s the most challenging method you can choose for a reflection.
Yes, wonderful. Thank you so much. And I think we don’t need to answer that conclusively either, but just try out this or that too, so to speak, and just look for yourselves too. I find, here of course, another aspect comes in again, you just said, it’s also really “demanding.” That means, that’s where we’re directly at competencies too, at the selection. That means, I’ll go into that more strongly tomorrow too. At the digital campfire, so you’re all really, really warmly invited to join again tomorrow morning at 8am too. Because there, in the sense of unvarnished stories, I’d really like to bring in a few examples too, on the topic of applying methods for self-reflection and possible dangers, to pick up exactly this point, which ultimately traces back to what competencies I actually bring with me, to actually apply this or that, and what can then also “go wrong,” so to raise awareness on this, to a degree. That’s not meant to say, in the sense of, per se, this or that person can’t apply this or that method, but rather to develop an awareness that there are certainly methods of varying difficulty. And while something like keeping a diary can be carried out relatively easily — I think all of us can manage that — it’s different with something like trance, where certain things can also happen that might not necessarily have the desired effect. I’ll gladly bring you a few examples for that tomorrow too. And I think that’s also exciting, to look at it from that perspective too. Nonetheless, something else occurred to me, Jürgen, while you were telling that, this last point, that it’s also exciting that the various methods can certainly also be applied for
different purposes. That means, I can, for example, take this aspect of trance, if I pick that up now. I, for example, quite deliberately applied trance for quite a while, to then, in this state, and this was during sports, while swimming, I did this — to swim the pool lane in a trance state and, in this trance state, play through the day’s schedule in front of my eyes, so that this then represents more of a kind of visualization, so not a reflection with regard to something that’s already taken place, but with regard to something directed toward the future, and then it’s actually not a reflection, but a kind of visualization of what awaits me that day and how I imagine it. And we know this from neuroscience too, that our brain can’t distinguish between the past and the future, that it plays it out as if it had already taken place, to manifest it, so to speak. And that’s really, really exciting, but it also needs a lot, a lot of practice, in quotation marks, and method competence, to actually be able to apply that in such a combination over time. But that shows quite nicely that I can apply various methods in different contexts, with different goals, ultimately depending on what I need it for, so it’s not the fixed method that only enables one thing or another, but just as I can combine, I can also do different things with it. Would anyone else like to build on this?
Gladly, Jürgen. Yes, I’d love to pick up your last words again, which basically go in the direction of — one of the essential, additional essential preconditions before I decide on the method is the purpose determination. What do I actually want to achieve with it? And specifically in the basic decision, let me define it this way for myself right now, that I say, should this reflection serve to understand myself better, and on the other hand, when we talk about the topic of perspective, I notice I need a perspective shift, then a different purpose exists for me — not understanding, but also questioning, and ultimately I want to learn, or my goal isn’t understanding, but learning, expanding my behavioral scope. And the third, and that was actually the point, the visualization you did while swimming — you can hear us marveling, that pleases me a lot, dear Yasemin — this visualization, in my view, is basically the essential foundation for this meditation, this type of meditation, essentially has a checking component for me too. Because if I visualize something, imagine a path, imagine a development, then it’s basically, actually necessary to permanently check whether I’m actually still on the path toward what I want to achieve with this reflection. So basically, another shot on top of that statement of yours, which I fully share. So for me, as I said, it’s the most challenging kind of method choice, choosing this meditation. Mind you, it can also be accompanied, or am I seeing that wrong?
Yes, absolutely. It can absolutely be accompanied, and I’d even recommend, if you don’t yet have the competencies to apply this method, to actually do that. As I said, tomorrow I’ll get more specific and precise about this too, and bring examples too, and also explain again why I’m of this opinion. Mind you, there are other opinions on this too, but accordingly I’ll bring examples tomorrow too, with which I’ll then explain why I think that, especially if you haven’t applied this method yet, don’t know it yet, I really clearly recommend doing that with accompaniment, until I’m at the point where I can carry that out for myself alone too, because it can bring certain side effects with it that might pop up unexpectedly. And I’d gladly like to go through a few examples of that with you tomorrow too. Layla, would you like to build on this too, or bring in another example?
Yes, very gladly. So I just thought for myself that I believe this constant moving-forward with a goal — I know this from further training I did, and I just thought of my teaching too, and thought, yes, it’s really important that the method fits me, and how do I actually notice that it fits me? Because, for example, there are methods, what you said with scaling, where movement also got incorporated. Imagine a scale, walk forward, how would you feel if you achieved that? Or a conscious — it was about teachers and learning advisors — sit on the other chair, how does this perspective shift feel? So an action got incorporated too. And then I thought, well, and I found all of that so medium back then. And that wasn’t at all because I denied someone competence, but I thought this method isn’t right for me. But I’d apply this method, so especially scaling and similar, and I don’t find it bad at all. For me it was just this goal, I wanted to learn something, I had this feeling, and then it seemed so suspicious to me in that moment, even though I actually think I’m open-minded, and I thought, yes, and when do I get to the point now, and when do I learn something like this now, and when do I get this form now, and when can I actually look now. I think that played into it, and maybe also, what is a learning advisor, what do you need to have or not have there? And I think it was probably hard for me to do that too, if I reflect on it now in hindsight. I wanted to briefly bring in how I work, gladly with images, that I show them at the beginning and say, and you can use that for various things, so for arriving, for a “how was it,” for imagining a situation. Which image would you choose, and then what thoughts do you have about it? And I think that enables more open thinking, and I always find that really nice. But I think we’re back a bit at this point, which method is suitable for whom, and how do you notice that? At the beginning, when I work with a group, I usually do a get-to-know-you round, and I have kind of a toolbox of methods and look at which method I apply. I think you should look at that, but also give yourself the possibility to try something out, because if you take me as an example, I thought that’s not right for me, or that’s not fast enough for me. In hindsight I’d say I should have given it more time and should have approached it differently. And if I now take myself out of it and look at it purely analytically, I have to say, how could you design this process, more people, yes, so they feel like they’ve arrived there. How do you have to explain such a method? What do you have to do at the start? So now I’m curious what you think of that.
Yes, ultimately I think there really is a difference here too, whether I’m the person myself, so the professional, so to speak, who accompanies that, or whether I apply the method for myself. So also to differentiate here again, with regard to this — I find a really important component is also to look at, what do I feel comfortable with? So we already briefly addressed that yesterday. I keep saying it, from my point of view there’s per se not really a good or bad method, but it’s always about the fit. And the fit is, on one hand, to check whether it fits the context I’m applying it for. So, what’s the goal and purpose? What am I applying it for right now? And the other is also to check the personal fit. And if it’s, say, a two-person constellation, then we don’t just have the fit to, say, the coach, but also the fit to the coachee. That means, even as a coach, it could well be that I might consider a certain method to be quite well-suited for my coachee. But if that’s a method I personally don’t feel comfortable with, I wouldn’t apply it. That means, we usually have, especially in such professional settings, at least these three, if not more, components of fit-matching taking place here. If I do that alone, privately, then I can of course, to a degree, look more strongly and really exclusively by preference too. There I don’t necessarily have to engage with it from this meta-level. There I can also draw on this or that method, and just try it out here too. Trying out is something I’d absolutely never do in a professional setting. So for trying out, you need a setting where there’s a protected space, where trying out is in the foreground, so to speak. I could do that, for example, in an intervision with professional colleagues, where we simply apply various methods together, try them out. I’d recommend that to every professional, by the way, whenever a new method is applied, to first try it on yourself, or together in an intervision with others, so to speak, with the commitment that, this is just, I’d like to try this method, try it out and see how it is, to actually apply it, and not to go tinkering in a professional context with a method I’ve never tried before and have no idea what that might trigger, or similar. So, in that sense, depending on which perspective I look at it from, there are certainly different approaches too. Is it a private context, where I try things out myself? Is it a professional context? And accordingly I’m in different roles and also carry a certain responsibility, to a degree. With that I’d like to move into the closing round for today. Mind you, we have the digital campfire again tomorrow, and I’m sure we can use this opportunity tomorrow too, after I bring in a few impulses, to talk about these aspects I’d like to address tomorrow on one hand, and at the same time also use this room, since it directly connects, as a kind of part two of today’s room, to touch on certain things again — and I’m really sure there are still a lot of things we haven’t addressed at all — that we can pick this or that up again tomorrow too, after it’s maybe worked on us today, so with a certain distance too, which can also be really helpful to come up with new thoughts again, in the sense of, oh, we didn’t address that at all, or didn’t mention it at all, that might also be important, to then be able to pick that up accordingly tomorrow too, and look at that again here too. And in that sense I’d like to move into the closing round now. What were the highlights from the room for you, Layla, Jürgen?
For me it was really — I’ve reflected, I’ve reflected on methods, and the word “fit” has stayed in my memory, because I found for myself that certain methods weren’t suitable for me. But that doesn’t mean they’re not suitable for me now, because when I think back to my professional time, I said, I’ll never work with a singing bowl, that’s too esoteric for me. And then I found there’s a singing bowl on my desk, now I can work with it. Humans aren’t crystalline, we change. And that’s why reflection is something really nice. And maybe you should also reflect, I’m not crystalline. And to what extent has my self changed? Is the method suitable for me now or not? And then do it the way you said. Thanks for listening. Nice room.
Yes, wonderful, thank you so much. Let me gladly add to that. One thing is that I of course also keep developing, and maybe how I react to methods, or how they affect me, also changes. And the other is, again, I said earlier, we have countless variations of methods. That means, even though it might still be the singing bowl, it might also have something to do with how the whole thing gets applied in the method constellation, so to speak, so how the method itself gets applied too. So it can also be that, through the approach with regard to the method, it didn’t appeal to me, and independent now of the personal development that’s taken place, a slightly modified form suddenly does something completely different to me. And I’m totally thrilled, so here too, always allowing that and just trying it out, and looking at it with curiosity.
Jürgen.
My heartfelt thanks, both of you here on stage, that I could take part in our discussion, which I find really fruitful again, and opened up new perspectives for me — two positions that, in my view, maybe could still have found consideration. One would be, try it with ChatGPT. I’ve done that, defined a reflection topic, and I was, in quotation marks, thrilled, because the way ChatGPT approached it really appealed to me as a structure- and terminology-affine person, might not be the case for one person or another. And the second point I still have in my topic storage is, wouldn’t it sometimes be opportune, or wouldn’t it be, to bring together, combine, complement various methods for a really specific reflection? So, still in line with your observation from yesterday or the day before, dear Yasemin, again a topic with tremendous complexity, and thanks again for you always ensuring the overall context and building the corresponding bridges. I’m looking forward to a nice weekend and hope to be able to join tomorrow. Thank you.
Yes, wonderful. Thank you so much, and especially combining different methods definitely, different approaches definitely too. So here I find, basically, there are no limits to our creativity either. So it doesn’t have to be a predefined method either, for example. I can also take something I theoretically find online and adapt it myself to fit me. So that’s certainly conceivable too, by the way. That means, and that’s also the background for why there are so many variations of methods too. That means, when you talk about a method and say, it’s scaling questions, then per se we might already know which direction it’s going in. But how that’s then designed in implementation can be really, really different, and also applied differently. And then, try it with ChatGPT, I find that a nice keyword here. Because on September 14th I have a talk on the topic of brain and AI, so to speak, and I’ve now brought the link back in. So, if you have the time and inclination, in the evening at 7pm, it’s free of charge, accessible via Zoom, to just join live, join online live, you’re warmly welcome to just connect there too. Just register via this link I just pinned. Just register as a guest, then you don’t pay anything for it. And I find exactly this aspect really important. To actually also take ChatGPT, or AI in general, into consideration too. ChatGPT is just one example of it, but AI in general, actually. I think I already briefly mentioned this yesterday, because we said the aspect of communication plays a really important role, and communication with myself, so in self-dialogue, then communication with others. And now a new component gets added, one we haven’t discovered and used for ourselves in the past, but which now, suddenly, through the developments, the technical developments, becomes possible. And here, that’s one of the future skills, actually entering into communication with machines, so to speak, so with artificial intelligence, and learning that. That’s a future skill, we don’t have that in our blood yet, in quotation marks, but we’re allowed to learn it now. And that’s why I find that so nice. Thank you, Jürgen, for picking that up again too. Now, toward the end, not to forget such systems and tools here too, but especially against the backdrop of the developments taking place, to quite specifically and consciously direct our focus onto that too, to actually get into learning here, gather experiences, gather insights, try it out, and just see how you can further optimize it. And for that, I think, this event on September 14th is certainly suitable, for all those who might want to get a little taste of it there, and for all those who’d like to go a bit deeper into it than before too. In that sense, I wish you a wonderful day, and I’m looking forward to tomorrow’s digital campfire with reflection part 2, improper application of self-reflection methods and possible dangers. We want to talk about that tomorrow, and in that sense I’m looking forward to everyone who joins tomorrow. Until then, ciao!
